Skilifts.org / SORT Forum

spunkyskier01, on 27 March 2008 - 11:26 AM, said:

"This Chairlift Does Not Slow Down To Load Or Unload."

A really popular resort (eg Breckenridge, Vail, or Keystone) could use this sign on all of their lifts. Who knows, it could help minimize the frequent stops and slows that plague Quicksilver Super6.

DonaldMReif, on 27 July 2009 - 07:21 AM, said:

I believe the Quicksilver lift is a detachable, so theoretically it does slow down to load and unload. Although I haven't been there in a few years so it may have changed.

One more from England.

skierdude9450, on 06 August 2009 - 06:23 PM, said:

Why did the Pelicans cross the road? To get over to the humps on the other side!
This post has been edited by DonaldMReif: 12 August 2009 - 05:36 AM

This thread was started on March 1st 2006 by yours truly. It began with this line:

"Am I the only one in this paranoid society who is sick and tired of "safety posters" and the hackneyed opportunists that are breathlessly hawking them?"

Since then, we have diverted into all manner of great signs and posters that we have seen - and that's been a ton of fun. But (to begin a sentence with a preposition) the original irritation still persists - "safety" hacks of all kinds still call us up asking for either a long-ago terminated "contact" employee or (even more annoying) "the person in charge of safety". I just hang up - but that doesn't stop the calls.

Today I answered a call from what turned out to be (after much interrogation) a company called Progressive Business Compliance - they first asked for a mountain manager who has been gone for years. After asking how long it had been since they last called, they then asked for "the person in charge of OSHA compliance (I hate the word compliance). I just hung up. They immediately called back - so I gave them a bogus contact name and an impossible chain of phone numbers and extensions to reach him. Should keep them busy for a while. I also took the trouble to find their website and to "contact" them. The following e-mail pretty much summarizes my feelings toward such companies and their products.

To: Progressive Business Compliance

To whom it might concern:

You will no longer place "sales" phone calls to Brian Head Resort. Remove us from your "hit list" immediately.

A few tips:

• You often ask for employees who have not worked here in years – this immediately flags you as a "sales" network. I just hang up.
• Asking for "the person in charge of "safety" or "whomever is in charge of OSHA compliance" also flags you as a sales hack. I just hang up.
• "Safety" is a completely overused word and should be avoided at all costs by intelligent people. Avoidance of injury is achieved neither through overpriced, trite posters nor an abundance of "official" forms. Safety is not just a slogan – it is also not some nebulous, unachievable utopia where no one is at risk. Accident reduction is the result of informed common sense and avoidance of hazardous situations. I seriously doubt that your company and its trash products are of much help in the real industrial world… even though there is no shortage of poorly-informed lay pundits who loudly insist otherwise.

Those of us who earn a living by producing useful products and services – and who daily risk our well-being by performing such work – generally ignore companies and products like yours as well as the mindless followers you have managed to convince that propaganda is a useful tool in avoiding injury.

I'm happy that you have secured gainful employment – shoddy though it is – but I will thwart your sales efforts whenever possible. My advice is to find a more productive occupation.

Ernest M. Fischer III
This post has been edited by Emax: 20 October 2009 - 10:46 AM

How do you really feel about Safety Guys, Bud?
ROFLMAO!

Dino

Hey - it worked! I just received this reply.

Just in case some of you would like to annoy the same person (who has probably annoyed you) - note the contact information included in the return e-mail.

Bud,
Thank you for the insights. I have removed your email and phone number from all of our lists.
Jennifer Hughes
Compliance Administrator
Progressive Business Compliance
370 Technology Dr.
Malvern, PA 19355
610-695-8600 x228
jhughes@pbp.com



This post has been edited by Emax: 20 October 2009 - 12:29 PM

If you can't find the book you're looking for, you might just be looking in the..............

Emax, on 20 October 2009 - 10:44 AM, said:

At my company we have assigned a "owner" named Jay Smith and we give it to anyone that calls and asks for a operations manager or whatnot. Makes them instantly identifiable from that point forward and they'll continue to use the fake name no matter how many times they get hung up on. Just makes life easier, and you can instantly tell who to screw with on rain days when we're bored.
This post has been edited by Andoman: 30 October 2009 - 06:06 PM

mikest2, on 30 October 2009 - 04:48 PM, said:

If you can't find the book you're looking for, you might just be looking in the..............

I've never seen that in Kelowna.
Thanks for the laugh, Mike!

Dino

These are just a few finds I made at the Adventure Aquarium in Camden, New Jersey:

I've heard that a ski resort has a similar slogan to this one:



Do you mean that Monsters vs. Aliens creature is on display here?


It talks about reverse-birth fish, but you might interpret it as meaning that men have the ability to give birth to children!


"Down the hall, up the star!" We get to climb up starfish!

Not really a sign, but....

The "Reliable" on the crane arm just takes the cake.

Back to signage, on the Grand Targhee boundary:

skierdude9450, on 21 November 2009 - 09:27 PM, said:

I think most people are smart not to avoid the cliff, I mean, smart enough to avoid the cliff without the signs.

Here's one I found at the Franklin Institute in Philadelphia:



It would be super appropriate to put on the launch pad area at the Kennedy Space Center!
This post has been edited by DonaldMReif: 30 November 2009 - 04:46 PM

You must have missed the humor in that. It seems to me that death would be a more serious result of going past the boundary than losing your pass, but to some ski bums maybe not.

It's a little bit of an post, but consider what would Space Mountain at Walt Disney World look like if it had a different sponsorship?

Original picture courtesy of www.disneypics.com. See how the entrance pylon would look the same, in all but:




This one above was just inspired by the previous Spaceship Earth sponsor.





We have a government agency sponsoring a theme park ride!



That famous toy store in New York City now sells tickets to the outter reaches of the galaxy.



Just inspired by the McDinoland sponsorship at Disney's Animal Kingdom.

 Space Mountain Sponsored By DHL Express.jpg (177.33K)
Number of downloads: 15
 Space Mountain Sponsored by United Nations Intelligence Task Force.jpg (304.72K)
Number of downloads: 20

A packing and delivering service delivers to the rest of the galaxy, and a Doctor Who agency also has sponsored with Disney before.

 Space Mountain Sponsored by Airbus.jpg (304.84K)
Number of downloads: 14

The maker of the Airbus A380 must be building the A480 Supersonic Star Cruiser.

 Space Mountain Sponsored by Kentucky Fried Chicken.jpg (315.23K)
Number of downloads: 6

Colonel Sanders must have decided he wanted to go see the rest of the universe....

Haha:

skierdude9450, on 28 February 2010 - 12:34 PM, said:

NO CONJOINED TWINS ALLOWED!

No words needed...

Came across these in a modern version of the King James


This post has been edited by Emax: 25 March 2010 - 02:23 PM